Adjective

1. Ridiculous or stupid.
Ex: This guy is “fit but he knows it” which is kind of endearing on hot chicks but looks chronicles of ridic on dudes.

Origin: Intitally Borrowed from Vice. But its not hard to put together a phrase that means ridiculous or stupid and a Vin Diesel movie.

Exclmation

1. A exclamation of joy.
Ex: I’m not preggers! Ahh yeah miss new booty!*

2. Song by Bubba Sparxxx

Origin: There isn’t really one. Its just entertaining to say and the video is great.

*There has been no pregnancy scares at Hecktionary HQ, but not having a baby seems like good news.

Verb

1. Delivering bad news while performing a hand-job.
Ex: “How did he take the break up?” “Pretty well, I let him down gently.”

2. Slowly and carefully lowering a person from a great height.

Origin: Jess said: “I guess I’ll have to let him down gently then…” Chris said: “So you’ll tell him while giving him a hand job?” This origin really isn’t doing the phrase any justice at all.

Noun or Verb

1. One person rubbing another person’s genitals through their jeans.
Ex: “You want to give me what? A jean job? Oh yeah that sounds great I’d love to have a raw and chapped dick.”
Ex 2: Jeanjob.com

2. Employment with Levi’s.

Origin: Jess hand her hand on Chris’s lap and Adam R. blurted out “are you giving him a jean job?”.

Verb

1. Sex.
Ex: I’ve been on your porch knock for like 20 minutes where the hell were you? We were upstairs fixing the air conditioner.

2. Being late on the account of having sex

3. Actually fixing problems with a air conditioning unit.

Origin: Derek and Becky were sexing it up when people showed up to their house. After a few minutes of knocking (on the door) they appeared, and Becky shouted “we were upstairs fixing the air conditioner”.

Noun or Verb

1. To get fat or simply to be fat.
Ex: Man, Topanga got mad glandular those last couple seasons of Boy Meets World.

Origin: Jess actually just out of no where said the example used in the definition.

Noun

1. A whore or slut
Ex: Look at that ho-ma over there. I better her breath smells like penis.

Origin: Borrowed from the Upright Citizens Brigade tv show, one of the best sketch shows ever.

Verb

1. Sex. Hot, dirty sex.
Ex: We’re getting mad-rutty tonight girl. Consider your architecture warned.

2. A general state of arousel/being very horny.

Origin: Borrowed from the comic Achewood. The strip in question can be seen here.

Verb

1. One person gripping both of another person’s hands with one hand.
Ex: Aghh. No. No, stop! No two-hand-one-hand. Give me my damn hands back.

2. Two hands being surgically grafted together, forming one hand.

Origin: Chris has much bigger hands than Jess does.

Noun

1. Any non-fatal STD, generally associated with crabs.
Ex: Dang y’all he gave me panty crickets.

2. Actual crickets in ones panties.

Origin: Amy Poehler playing Britney Spears on Saturday Night Live.