Noun

1. Hermaphrodite
Ex: “I heard Lady Gaga is a herm, but I’d still bang him/her.”

2. A guy who runs a record store in Grand Rapids Michigan.

Origin: Simple word shortening, nothing bananas.

Noun

1. A woman who’s ugliness insights a man to instantly depress his erection (boner) instantly ruining whatever he had cooked up in his head.
Ex: Officer BonerBender over there is working her terrible magic with the jumpsuit.

2. Someone intent on ruining a wonderful evening in whatever way possible.

Ex: Nice job Officer BonerBender, you just got us kicked out of a bar..

Origin: Vice do’s and dont’s can I just say this column is consistantly hilarious

Verb or Noun

1. To jostle or shake someone.
Ex: Oh god, stop Jocelyn Eldersing me, I’ve got mad drama pipes.

2. Masturbation, or to call someone a masturbater.
Ex: Looks like you need to shave those palms Jocelyn Elders.

Origin: Jocelyn, jostling, jostlin’, pretty straight forward. As for the masturbation meaning, Elders was appointed by Bill Clinton to be United States Surgeon General. During her time in that position she probably most well know for (and made fun of constantly) for her statement made at a United Nations conference on AIDS about masturbation “I think that it is part of human sexuality, and perhaps it should be taught.” So Jocelyn Elders = spanking it.

Noun or Verb

1. To get fat or simply to be fat.
Ex: Man, Topanga got mad glandular those last couple seasons of Boy Meets World.

Origin: Jess actually just out of no where said the example used in the definition.

Noun

1. A whore or slut
Ex: Look at that ho-ma over there. I better her breath smells like penis.

Origin: Borrowed from the Upright Citizens Brigade tv show, one of the best sketch shows ever.

Noun
Sounds like: beige

1. Short for Asian
Ex: All aiesh lady have side-ways architecture.

Origin: Not totally sure, it just kind of became a thing. Though it is much more likey to be linked to race related jokes than it is to simple word shortening.

Adjective

1. A condition describing some one’s awful scarred up face. It often comes with the phrase “been hit with a bag of hot nickels”. Deep scarring and pitting are typical and is used to describe the unattractive. (See here)

Ex: Ugh, she got Allan Trammell face!

2. Allan Trammell’s actual face.

Origin: Grand Rapids. Adam R. is partially credited. A way to insult ugly women even further than he normally does.

Verb

1. Giving up on life.
Ex: My dreams are stupid, and everything i wanted it retarded, screw it, I’m going to Everest.

2. Going to everest.edu
Origin: Those horrible Everest school ads that play constanly during the daytime, and late at night, that no matter what your situation (employeed or not) make you feel like complete trash and everything you want is pointless and Everest is the only way to get ahead in life.

Adjective

1. To refer to one’s self as being overweight for a period of time.
Ex: I think that the photo was from “fat times at Ridgemont High”.

Origin:Thinking about herself last year, Jess introspectively remembers her approximate shape or blob.

Noun

1. Coward
Ex: Go on, dance on the architecture already you ball drinker.

2. A falatious individual (?)

Origin: Chris and Adam R. nonsense. Attempting to recreate the conversation that created this phrase here would be impossible and very inappropriate.